Caught Red Handed (Liz)

Caught red handed, bitches branded
and theyre chillin around cuz theyre chronic dope fiends
getting wasted off of those things
that give me reasons to rhyme.
like I remember one time
when it got outta hand
I walked around losin benja-MAN.
Hes into that too busy groove and quickly lost his swagga.
And I knew it was coming
I really did its true
cuz as soon as I got my hopes so high all the happy yellow turned blue.
Like the rain from the sky that hits the ruts in the road
but I will walk this out like a full grown toad
and then the snow will fall down so that I can ride again
and not have to worry about missing another friend.
All this shit piles on me so high,
one minute I’m so happy the next I’m off key with myself feelin broken inside.
Want to be born again,
from pampers to depends
where I don’t have to rely on anyone for a while
and I can trust myself to be me read me and not worry about
all the guys that wanna do me screw me fool me lose me accuse me rinse and reuse me like a fucking dish napkin at evening brunch that they wipe their mouths with when its time for real lunch
and shape up wake up gotta redo my make up
and clean my face with the dawn suds in the cold water of their stone hard souls
cuz I sit back and let it happen.
i lost that confidence in me
and now its all in my head
this burning fire and rage that nobody wants me.
ive been there before
back and forth like the swing from fourth grade
when the sky hit me soft and conformed to my being,
that’s the closest I got to flying away
like the bird in the tree who saw me
and knew that I was losin it
cuz all I do is analyze shit.
I know I cant help it,
it wont go away cuz it’s a habit that i have
and hate to this day.
So when they come for me
I wont be ready
cuz im busy tryin to reset this zooming in and out on the sweet frame of life. Refocus, induce, embrace within
cuz if I keep letting it happen
it wont be what I need, wont be healthy,
wont be that yum fresh shredded parmesian cheese at the grocery.